TGIF: I Am the Code

The Free Press

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55:T10973,2d:o10973,TGIF: I Am the CodeTrump launches Trump TV, Anthropic opens a wet lab, Claudine Gay returns to Harvard, a lesbian bar rolls back its mask requirements, and more!
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TGIF Friday, 09.25.2026 View in App
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TGIF: I Am the CodeTrump launches Trump TV, Anthropic opens a wet lab, Claudine Gay returns to Harvard, a lesbian bar rolls back its mask requirements, and more!
First Lady of China Peng Liyuan; President of China Xi Jinping; U.S. President Donald Trump; and First Lady Melania Trump look on from the South Portico of the White House on September 24, 2026, in Washington, D.C. (Andrew Harnik via Getty Images)
By Nellie Bowles PREVIEW
Hello, and welcome back to another great week of disturbing news.
In internal updates: Are you interested in helping The Free Press grow? We’re looking for a devoted growth marketer. Despite now being part of the Skydance-Media-Paramount-Warner Brothers conglomerate to end all conglomerates, The Free Press is still a little pirate ship, and our pirates keep getting reprimanded for not wearing shoes in our shiny new office. Come aboard! Speaking of growth marketing: We now have gift links for paid subscribers! And users can download the app to get extra sends every month.
→ Trump TV: Donald J. Trump has banned three large mainstream media outlets from the White House, a move that is likely unconstitutional and is extremely North Korea–coded. And which a judge promptly blocked. Here’s Trumpo, in his typical eloquent style:
Listen, as the woman married to the media villain of the decade, you think I like the mainstream press? I don’t. This week, 60 Minutes ratings are literally up over last year, and the media blasts out that they’re terrible. It’s annoying. But, you see, I’m not a tiny baby. We put on our big-girl pants and face the day. We save our rage for our Friday columns, and just barely. But Trump just cannot seem to find his husky khakis. And so he’s banning radical woke anti-American publications from the White House such as. . . Politico? This is a little like when Barack Obama banned mainstream media photographers from many of his events, allowing only White House staff photographers, thereby authorizing only those images that made him look heroic and hot. Understandable. But still: Such constant weakness from our commander-in-chiefs makes me miss the days of President Dick Cheney, a real man.
Trump held a ribbon-cutting ceremony for something or another several days after his media ban, but there was no audio because the remainder of the press pool had all dropped out in solidarity with their kin. So all we see is Trump, in a beautiful self-own, standing at a ribbon, shouting silently into the wind.
Not yet finished for the week, Trump then launched an official 24/7 White House YouTube channel called Trump TV, promoted like a 2007 TLC reality show.
Maybe it’s just me, but I’m a little sick of 24/7 Trump TV. I’m just tired. I’m wondering if there’s anything else on. So much of our life has been this. The last season of Trump is just dragging on a bit. The formula is pretty repetitive. Hopefully the finale is as punchy as the early episodes.
→ Quotes of the week: “I am the code.” That’s Trumpo telling the (now former) White House ballroom architect to stop worrying so much about building safety codes. Note to self: Do not ever enter the White House ballroom. If you flush a toilet in there, the chandelier is going to crash down...
Continue reading 'TGIF: I Am the Code'
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